


Every Action Has Its Equal Opposite Reaction

by elephantsofmemory



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-08-17 03:11:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8128090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elephantsofmemory/pseuds/elephantsofmemory
Summary: Erin likes Holtzmann, but she is definitely not doing anything about it, because ignoring crushes always works.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction ever! I am very excited about this movie, and everyone in it is very gay and I love it.

Erin couldn't concentrate.

It wasn't Holtzmann's fault, really – except it was. By now, Erin was used to the resident engineer's antics, neither the ridiculous music nor the clanking, muttering and occasional cursing that went along with Holtzmann's work could shake her focus. Their shared workspace on the second floor of the firehouse was divided neatly in half, with Abby, Patty and Erin much preferring to stay out of the way of Holtz's sometimes extremely volatile inventions, but they'd all adjusted to the noise constantly surrounding the engineer.

Lately though, Erin had been catching herself drifting off from her work and staring at Holtzmann instead. The way she moved fascinated her: she went from being a whirlwind of jerky and erratic movements to completely motionless and focused in a heartbeat, and trying to foretell the shifts was near impossible. Erin found herself watching the quick and sure movement of Holtz's hands, or the look of concentration on her face, or the way her body moved so gracefully through the maze of delicate machinery –

“Holtz!”

Surprised at her sudden outburst, Holtzmann turned around, one eyebrow quirked.

“Could you – um, could you turn down the music? Please?”

“Sure thing, sweetcheeks,” she said and winked. Erin gave her a tight nod of thanks. When she turned around, Abby was giving her an incredulous look. Erin pressed her lips together and stared back, and after a few seconds, Abby shrugged and went back to her own work.

Erin dropped her eyes, heat creeping up her face, sure the others could tell that something was off about her reaction. She sighed and sat down firmly at her desk, determined to focus on her work and nothing else for the rest of the day.

She had been intrigued by Holtzmann from the moment she'd met her, and her fascination only deepened as she got to know her more. Holtzmann was one of her best friends, but Erin felt differently about her than about Abby or Patty; she wanted to just exist in the woman's orbit, talk to her about anything, everything, have that sharp focus turned on her and her alone.

She had known that she was bi for as long as she could remember. Being attracted to a woman wasn't what was throwing her off about this situation, she had met many women she was interested in, even if she had never done anything about it. No, what was frightening about this wasn't that she was attracted to another woman, it was that her attraction to Holtz was steadily growing into a serious crush, and if Erin knew one thing about herself, it was that she was anything but smooth when it came to liking someone.

* * *

“Abby, we are not watching Marley & Me again, all of us were a complete mess at the end!”

“But it has puppies! I know what you're up to, you're going to make us watch another boring rom-com! She used to do this in high school, you know, she can't get enough of them,” Abby stage-whispered to Patty.

“Marley & Me is a rom-com,” Erin mumbled, blushing.

“I'm just going to say this one more time: Lord of the Rings marathon,” Holtzmann piped up from her position on the floor, holding a DVD up to illustrate her point.

“Enough!” Patty shouted. “If y'all are going to keep fighting like this, I'll have to make an executive decision.” She took a calming breath. “Wall-E. It's cute, it's got adventure, and it's got weird robot romance.” She stared challengingly at her three fellow Ghostbusters, daring them to contradict her. Abby opened her mouth to say something, before taking a breath and closing it again.

“That's... perfect, actually. Thanks, Patty,” Erin said.

Holtzmann unearthed the DVD from under her left knee, holding it out to Patty triumphantly. “If you would do the honors, milady.”

Somehow, Erin ended up on the middle of the sofa, with Abby on one and Holtzmann on the other side and a bowl of popcorn in her lap. Half an hour into the movie, Holtzmann was listing more and more in Erin's direction, slouching on the couch and constantly adjusting her position, until with her next shift, Erin felt the warm weight of the engineer's head settle on her shoulder. She held her breath. Her stomach was fluttering and a warm, contented feeling slowly spread through her body. She wasn't sure if Holtzmann was asleep, but when her hand sneaked into the popcorn bowl a few minutes later, the fluttering increased. Somehow the fact that Holtz had deliberately leaned on her made the sensation that much better, and Erin instinctively tried to stay as still as possible so that Holtz's head would stay on her shoulder, even though she was somewhat embarrassed by the force of her reaction.

This had nothing to do with her, she scolded herself. Holtzmann was just a physical person: she was constantly touching the people she interacted with, small, friendly touches, even with people she hadn't known for long. She didn't attach the same significance to physical affection as Erin, who only ever touched people to convey deep emotion; it had taken months before she would even hug Abby. But Holtzmann touched them constantly, even more so now that they were all living in the firehouse, so Erin had to remind herself that there was no deeper meaning attached to the physical contact.

That didn't mean that she couldn't enjoy it, though, she thought, as Holtzmann shifted to lean more fully against her, resting her curled-up legs against Erin's thigh. Even if she was ashamed to admit it.

When the movie ended, the Ghostbusters slowly disentangled themselves from their nest on the couch, opting to leave the cleaning-up until tomorrow as they made their way to the third floor of the firehouse. Abby and Patty headed down the hall to their bedrooms, and Erin turned to Holtz, awkwardly clearing her throat. “Well, uh, good night, Holtz. Sleep tight,” she said and instantly cringed internally.

Holtz just smiled, the look uncharacteristically soft around the edges. “You too, Gilbert. Don't let the bed bugs bite!” She winked and vanished in her bedroom, leaving Erin standing in the hallway, trying to get her heart rate under control.

* * *

Over the next few days, Erin became hyper-aware of every touch that passed between her and Holtzmann. Every time the engineer leaned over her to show her how a new piece of equipment worked, or excitedly grabbed her hand while she was talking at lightning speed, or even when she just tapped Erin's shoulder to get her attention, Erin's heart skipped a beat and her stomach felt like it was home to a swarm of very agitated honeybees. It was incredibly distracting, especially when she realized that she kept wandering over into Holtz's workspace in the hopes that she might need help with anything or want to strike up a conversation about whatever she was working on.

She decided that she needed to talk about this to someone, so she cornered Abby in the kitchen when Holtz and Patty were out getting lunch for everyone; they categorically disagreed on what constituted a satisfying lunch, so Erin knew it would take a while for them to get back with whatever they would eventually decide on.

Abby glanced over her shoulder when Erin entered the kitchen, fiddling nervously with the hem of her sweater. “Hi there. Do you want some cereal?”

“What? No. Why are you eating cereal? It's two in the afternoon.”

Abby shrugged. “It's never a bad time to eat cereal.” She turned around and leaned back against the counter, bowl in hand. When she took in Erin's tense figure, she frowned. “What's got your panties in a bunch? And please don't say you want to update the bathroom cleaning schedule again, because I swear to god –“

“No!” Erin interrupted her. “No, it's– I have– you know what, it's stupid, nevermind –”

“Hey, no, wait,” Abby said, much gentler this time, and grasped Erin's arm before she could turn away. “I was just teasing, come on. You know you can talk to me about anything. What's up?”

“I –” Erin blew out a thin stream of air through her lips, trying to calm herself. “You know how in high school you asked me who I thought was hot in our class, and I, um –”

“You told me you liked Angela, and then you told me you were bi and I told you that that was completely fine? Yeah, I remember. I'm really hoping that isn't what this is about, because I don't want to even have to tell you that nothing's changed about that.”

“No, I know. I know that,” Erin said, although she couldn't help feeling a little relieved at Abby's words. “I just, I think– I think I might like Holtz,” she mumbled quickly, dropping her eyes to stare at the floor.

“Um. Yeah,” Abby said after a brief silence. “I know. It's pretty obvious.”

Erin's head snapped up. “It is?”

“Yeah. You follow her around the lab like a lost puppy, Erin, it's pretty hard not to notice.”

“Oh no,” Erin muttered, burying her face in her hands. She hadn't thought she was being obvious to anyone but herself, but if Abby had noticed– She couldn't even finish the thought, it was too humiliating.

“Hey,” Abby swiftly crossed over to Erin and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Don't beat yourself up about it. It's pretty cute. And for the record,” she waited until Erin lowered her hands and looked at her. “I'm pretty sure Holtz likes you too. She won't even let me look at most of her prototypes, but she talks about them to you all the time. She even gets you to help her out.” She bumped Erin's hip with her own. “For her, that's practically a marriage proposal.”

Erin laughed half-heartedly, not convinced. Just when she was about to ask Abby what she thought she should do now, the door to the firehouse banged open and Holtzmann strode in, striking a dramatic pose in front of the doors and announcing loudly: “Ladies and no gentlemen, the food hath arrived!”

Patty walked in behind her, shaking her head and holding a bag of what looked like salads and sandwiches. When Abby went to meet her, Patty's eyes fell on the bowl of half-eaten cereal Abby had left on the counter. Sensing the oncoming storm, Holtzmann hastily retreated towards the kitchen, hopping up on the counter beside Erin and propping her arm up on Erin's shoulder, watching the squabble between their two fellow Ghostbusters.

“Oh hell no! Abby, you better not be eating that sugar crap again! I told you, you need real food!”

“It's got fiber and vitamins, it says it right there on the package! Don't talk to me about too much sugar, Miss Starbucks Frappucino with chocolate chips!”

“It's like watching two angry chickens squawk at each other,” Holtzmann whispered, and Erin snorted as Patty stalked around the table towards Abby. She leaned into Holtzmann, content for the moment to watch their friends argue and not caring about the implications of the touch.

Later, after they'd all eaten their “real food” and Holtz and Patty had gone back upstairs to get back to work, Abby glanced at Erin while they were clearing off the table. “Look, Erin,” she sighed. “I know how you get when you like someone, but maybe think about just telling her? I'm sure it won't go as badly as you're imagining.”

“Yeah, I'll... I'll think about it,” Erin said, privately thinking that that was the last thing she would do. She would just try and bury her crush as deep as it would go; so far, that had always worked. Eventually.

* * *

When Erin jerked awake in the middle of the night, it was no surprise to her. She didn't have nightmares anymore, not really, but it seemed that somewhere along the way, her body had just picked up the habit of waking her up abruptly every couple of nights. She stared at the ceiling for a while, orienting herself in the space of her bedroom, before taking a deep breath and swinging her legs out of bed. She padded down the stairs to the kitchen – a cup of tea was as much a habit at this point as the waking up was.

When she got to the kitchen, she was surprised to see someone already there, leaning against the counter with a mug cradled between her hands. The lamp over the stove illuminated Holtzmann's crazy mess of hair from behind, giving her a slightly otherworldly look. “Hey, ghost girl,” she said softly, dimples appearing on her face as she smiled at Erin. “What are you doing up at this hour?” She was wearing boxers and a too-big t-shirt with a faded illustration of Bugs Bunny on it, and she looked so adorably rumpled that Erin momentarily forgot how to use her mouth.

“I don't– I'm... I'm just – getting tea. Why are you up?” she stammered, struggling to regain her composure.

“Well, I've never been a very regular sleeper. Some of my best ideas come after three in the morning,” the engineer grinned, running a hand through her sleep-tangled hair.

“Right,” Erin muttered, busying herself with the kettle.

Holtzmann frowned. “Everything okay, Gilbert?”

“Yeah, I'm fine, just,” Erin turned around to face her, smiling nervously. “Just tired, I guess.”

“Ah. Well, in that case I won't ask if you'd like to come up to the roof with me – sometimes I get bored at night, and you can see the stars from up there –”  


“Yes,” Erin interrupted her. “I mean, no I– I mean, I can never go back to sleep when I wake up in the night, so...”

“Great!” Holtzmann grinned. “Then make your tea and get your ass up there!” and she vanished up the staircase.

Erin stared blankly at the kitchen counter, trying to calm her nerves. How was she supposed to bury her crush like this? Stargazing on the roof alone with Holtzmann was the opposite of what she should be doing. Abby's advice ghosted through her mind, but she shook her head. This would just be two friends who coincidentally couldn't sleep on the same night getting some fresh air on the roof. Right. Resolutely, she poured the by now cooling water into her mug and followed Holtzmann upstairs, grabbing a blanket from the couch on her way.

She opened the door to the roof and stepped out into the chilly air; it wasn't very cold yet, but fall was definitely coming. Holtz was sitting on the broad ledge at the edge of the roof, and Erin walked over to her, stomach still churning nervously. She didn't sit down on the ledge, instead leaning against it next to Holtzmann, but she did spread the blanket over both of their shoulders. Holtzmann smiled and glanced at her out of the corner of her eye before directing her gaze back to the night sky. “You can't see a whole lot here, light pollution and all, but you can see the brightest ones and those are still pretty cool.” She lifted her hand to point at a few stars.

“Can I be honest?” Erin said. “I love the stars, but I was never any good at finding constellations. I know what they're supposed to look like, but I could never actually see them in the sky.”

Holtzmann laughed. “Me neither, but honestly, I never really cared. Some things you just need to appreciate without categorizing them.”

“Yeah,” Erin said quietly.

Silence fell as the two scientists looked up at the sky. Erin hadn't felt this peaceful in a while. It wasn't that her life with the Ghostbusters was stressing her out, she had just never been good at taking breaks, letting go of the rambling of her brain; this was a rare moment of quiet, and she let herself enjoy it, thinking about nothing in particular, just simply existing for a while.

She opened her mouth without really thinking about it. “I'm really glad I met you, you know,” she said, turning her head to look at Holtzmann.

“Yeah?” Holtzmann turned to face her.

“Yeah. I thought I had it all, you know, a great job...” she paused. “I didn't really have much more than that, come to think of it. I worked so hard for all those people to respect me, but I don't think they ever really did. But now,” she smiled, still looking at Holtzmann. “I hunt ghosts for a living. Ghosts! And... I have you guys. Honestly, that's worth– you're worth losing any job over.”

Holtzmann was staring at her, a strange, soft look on her face. The silence between them stretched longer, and just as Erin was about to ask her what was wrong, Holtzmann leaned forward, closing the distance between them, and kissed her.

It was gentle and sweet, not at all what Erin had expected a kiss from Holtzmann to be like, and her brain was having trouble catching up with the fact that _Holtzmann was kissing her_. When she finally came out of her daze, Holtz had already pulled away, searching her face. She didn't seem to find what she was looking for though, because she leaned back, putting more distance between her and Erin, and turned her head away. “Shit. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to– can we... can we just forget that ever happened–”

“No, Holtzmann– Holtz, please,” Erin interrupted her stammering, gripping the engineer's arm a bit too tightly. When Holtz looked back at her, she said quietly, “I don't want to forget that happened.”

“No?” Holtz whispered, eyes flicking rapidly between Erin's.

Erin shook her head mutely. She raised her free hand to cup Holtzmann's cheek, trembling only slightly, and saw her eyes widen before Erin leaned in to kiss her again.

It only took a second for Holtzmann to respond, winding her arms around Erin's neck and kissing her as if she were a precious thing, like she could slip away at any second, gentle and deep and desperate.

When they finally surfaced, Erin kept her eyes closed and leaned her forehead against Holtz's. She opened her eyes a few seconds later to find Holtz already looking at her and smiling widely. Erin blushed and dropped the hand still cupping Holtzmann's face, leaning back, suddenly nervous.

“Um. That–”

“Yes,” Holtzmann agreed, her smile growing impossibly wider.

“So you...” Erin wanted to make absolutely sure. “... like me?”

“Yup. I thought everyone knew. It was driving Abby crazy, she kept nagging me to tell you already. I think she'll be very pleased.”

“Uh-huh,” Erin replied, still a bit dazed. “Wait, Abby?”

“Yes, but I'd rather leave her out of this right now. We're at a prime romantic location here, I say we make our time count.”

“Okay,” Erin mumbled against Holtzmann's lips, content to lose herself in them as the sky slowly turned lighter.


End file.
